The Fortress
by Grinder-Lector
Summary: Meet Pierre Montgomery, a highly intelligent FBI agent who is despised by his colleagues due to his arrogance and condescending attitude. When a promotion is up for grabs, Pierre finds himself joining a group of 8 men who are just as skillful and strong as himself. How will he cope with this new team. FIRST TF2 fanfic! R & R please :)
1. Chapter 1

**AN: OK so this is my first Team Fortress 2 fanfic. In this fanfic I will also use scenes from films and recreate them but with the tf2 characters. Why? Because I cannot come up with my own humorous ideas :D **

**Disclaimer: I do not own of the TF2 characters for they belong to VALVe. Also in this first chapter I'm kinda using the opening to The Heat which I do not own neither. It belongs to Katie Dippold.**

**So on with the story.**

**Chapter 1**

Pierre exited the van with his colleagues and took no time to look at the house they were about to enter. The men retreated to the back of the house and hid beside the shed. The men crouched and watched the back door for any signs of movement.

Pierre stood at the front and made silent hand gestures to his team. One of the men looked at him with a quizzical expression. Pierre sighed and tried to make his hand gesture clearer by nodding his head to the door and holding up four fingers.

"Can't you just speak?" The man questioned irritated, "I doubt they'll hear us."

Pierre rolled his eyes and sighed. He whispered loudly, "I was saying to wait for four minutes before infiltrating the place. Are you all incompetent idiots."

The man sighed and moved towards the door. Pierre sighed at his actions.

"FREEZE, FBI!" One of the men shouted as they broke the door down and retreated to the living room with their guns raised. Two men sat on a sofa with Xbox remotes in their hands. Another man with a gun ran into the house with a search dog.

"See, Montgomery, I told you there would be nothing here," Pierre's colleague sighed whilst lowering his weapon.

Pierre sighed and wore a haughty smile. He turned to the men on the couch, "Gentlemen," they took note of his French accent, "sorry to pop in unannounced but we know what you have been hiding here."

Pierre looked at the table. There sat a plate with greasy BBQ ribs, "I love the idea of distracting the dog, here, with this meal."

He bent over and reached to the underside of the table. When he pulled his hand away, he was holding a back of weed.

"Is this yours? I mean, who else does it belong to," Pierre smiled. The two men rolled their eyes and sighed.

"OK, Montgomery, once again you're right. Can we just take their asses in?" The colleague sighed.

Pierre stood up and walked towards the fire place. He leant against it with one arm propped up on its wooden surface. He turned back to face the two men.

"You know they loved these houses during the Prohibition Era," he started, "People liked to store their alcohol in a secret place. People loved to drink it even though they weren't supposed to. And these houses had all these little nooks and crannies where they could hide it…like this one."

Pierre pressed his thumb against a piece of the fire place. Behind his head two doors pulled apart revealing inside a cabinit full of guns. The two men sighed with frustration.

"Is there something behind me?" He smiled challengingly, "thought so."

Pierre began to strut towards the door with an arrogant smile on his face.

His colleague looked at the search dog and gritted his teeth, "Nice work, dick."

Pierre left the house with a confident smile on his face and made his way towards a car. He got into the passenger seat.

"Driver, make haste," he commanded. He then looked to his left to see no one in the drivers seat. He sighed frustratedly.

One of the men with the guns looked at arrogant man in the car.

"Hard to believe he's single," he said sarcastically. Another man laughed at the comment.

**AN: Short and sweet but meh hope you guys like it so far. And before you ask, yes, Pierre is the Spy.**

**R &amp; R**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Yeah so I got one review so far. It was from my brother -_- The reason they sigh a lot is cause I rushed the first chapter so sorry if it wasn't that good guys. I'll try and be more focused in this chapter.**

**ALSO I know TF2 is set in the 1970's but I'm gonna change that around a bit and make it around these times. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Team Fortress 2. It belongs to VALVe and I am happy they made it :') I also don't own any of the songs used at this party.**

**So on with the story.**

**Chapter 2 **

"'Cause we be in the club  
Bottles on deck  
And god dammit, God dammit  
I'm feeling myself."

Ahhh, one of the many good songs that played the celebration night. And not only was the music amazing, but the house and surroundings were also spectacular. The house was huge and over looked an ocean and entire town. The music was blaring and the lights were shining brighter than a thousand lanterns. The sky was dark with tiny stars and the wind failed to blow.

People were scattered all around the area, dancing and drinking, talking and laughing. It was a good party and the RED team knew they deserved it.

A young man wearing a t shirt, jeans and converse made his way past the people, he shook their hands and made haughty comebacks as he received their ass kissing compliments.

"Yo, Scout, you're the man," one man said as he passed the Scout a drink.

"Dude, I was told that even before my ole Ma popped me out," he laughed as he took the drink as well as another guest's drink.

A sudden commotion caught his attention. A crowd of girls started their 'hormonal-teenage-girls' act and squealed when they saw a devilish looking ma approach them. His skin was tanned and his hair was dark. He was wearing a red shirt with a jacket slung over his shoulder. His jeans were brown and boots were black. He wore sunglasses d had stubble on his face. He was known as the Sniper. He embraced them all with long open arms smiling like a cheshire cat. Like Scout, he received a number of ass kissing compliments but with a bit of extra 'touchy feeliness'. He saw one of his teammates nod to him. The man had dark hair which was parted down the side. He wore glasses on his face and wore a white shirt with a tie, black trousers and shoes. Sniper then saluted with his finger to the man who he knew as the Medic. They both wore haughty smiles.

People cheered as a being wearing a heat protective suit and gasmask made an attempt to set fire to shots that lined one of the alcohol tables with a flame thrower. Their cheering then ceased as the table burst into flames. Thankfully the panic ceased as someone poured a bucket of swimming pool water over the flames. The people sighed with relief. All except the Pyro let out a yell and then aimed his flame thrower at the crowd. They gasped and took 3 steps away from the pyromaniac.

"Ah, Maggots', no fear," a man stepped out from the crowd. He was tall buff man wearing a formal suit and…a helmet?

"Pyro refrains from destroying anyone when not on the battlefield," he patted the Pyro on the back and laughed, "Once he cut off my hand…with an axe. It's just his way of showing he respects us."

People nodded in understanding. Two girls approached the Soldier and Pyro and began dancing seductively around them.

…..

The Soldier, Pyro, Medic, Scout and Sniper sat around a table in an open area of the building. People discreetly stood close to them and listened into the mens' conversations of their triumphs.

"MAKE WAY! MAKE WAY FOR OLE TAVISH!" A voice bellowed getting closer to the table. As the crowd parted there stood a dark skinned man wearing a formal suit with tie sloppily done. He had an eye patch on his face and a bottle of cider in his hand. He stumbled as he made his way through the people.

"I get a feeling that I never never never never had before, no no, I get a good feeling ," The drunken man sang with a hint of slurring. He threw himself down onto a chair beside the Sniper, "This…is my song…not yours…mine…" He went to take a sip of his cider. Sniper snatched the bottle from him.

"Think you've had a bit too much, mate," he smiled at the drunken fool.

"Friends! Good times!" A Russian voice boomed. The crowd parted again. A large heavy man pushed past the people. He was wearing a shirt with black trousers and shoes. He sat down beside the Demoman. Following after him was a small man wearing the same attire.

"How's it goin', boys?" The man had a southern drawl.

"We were startin' to wonder where you guys were at," Scout welcomed the two men and took a drink, "Heavy, man, you look a bit excited."

"Today is a good day, boys," the Soldier smiled. The other men approved

"Men," Heavy spoke up, "I have surprise to show you."

The Engineer looked as if he couldn't contain himself, "Heavy's girlfriend is gonna make an appearance tonight."

The men at the table and a few guest standing around made approving sounds.

"Never told us you had a Sheila, Heavy, mate," Sniper leaned over the table to get a better look at the huge Russian.

"How long ya been hidin' that secret from us?" Scout snickered.

The Heavy hesitated before answering, "Two…years."

More oohing and ahhing sounds were made clear.

"Ever hear of Misters before Sisters, Heavy?" Sniper questioned teasingly, "Thought we were friends."

The Medic sighed and rolled his eyes, "Herr Heavy, what is this _Fräulein_ like? Two years is a long time. She must be special."

"Yeah, is she blind? She desperate?" Scout snickered, "Her names Helga right? She have a uni-brow?"

"The prettiest tiniest woman in entire world," Heavy sneered at the immature boy. The Scout only laughed which earned him a flick on the head by the Engineer.

…..

In another area of the party, the Demo stood in front of a huge plasma screen. A microphone was in his hand.

"Taaaaaaaaaaake oooooooooon meeeeeeee," he slurred whist he sang, "Taaaaaaaaaaake meeeeeeeeeeeeeee oooooooooooon. I'll beeeeeeee a Scotsman and I don't know the woooooords."

People cheered and laughed at the drunken Scotsman as he attempted to sing the words that appeared on the screen.

"YOU'RE THROUGH TO THE NEXT ROUND, MATE!" The Sniper laughed as he drank his beer can. The Medic stood next to him and laughed aloud.

"Urkomisch!" The German man shouted with glee. He looked to the Sniper for appraisal to see the Australian was looking in the opposite direction.

Walking through the crowd was a young woman with long dark hair. Her skin was slightly tanned skin and full round eyes. She wore a black dress that was tight along the torso, flared out from the waist below and it came to her knees. It was safe to say that she was stunning

She looked as if she was looking for someone as her eyes scanned the crowd.

"I'm gonna have a gander at this beauty," Sniper stared.

The Medic looked to where the Australian was staring at.

"Hello, Fraulein," the Medic said even though the lady was not in hearing range.

The Heavy walked up to the two men who were staring with awe.

"Who…" he then went wide eyed at the woman.

The next event which happened shocked the Sniper and Medic as they saw the woman look in their direction. She then smiled and began to glide over to them.

"Ivan!" The woman squealed with excitement as she got closer.

"Ivan?" Sniper said aloud giving a quizzical look.

"Lori!" The Heavy exclaimed as he advanced towards the tiny woman. The two embraced affectionately. The Sniper and Medic gasped.

"No way, mate," Sniper stared.

"Men! This is Heavy's girlfriend!" Heavy bellowed to the two men.

He announced this so loud, the Demoman stopped singing and shuffled over to them.

"Ahhh, Heavy's got 'imself a pretty wee lassy, ain't he?" He nudged the Medic with his elbow in an irritating way.

Lori looked flattered, "I take it you're the Demoman," she then looked at the other men, "And you goes are the Medic and Sniper. Ivan's told me a lot about you guys."

"Good things, I hope," Sniper smiled at the woman.

"We've heard great things of you too, _Fräulein," the Medic mentioned._

"Two years…must be a good relationship I expect," Sniper commented.

"Be honest. Who doesn't love this big, cute cuddly guy?" Lori put on a voice as if she was speaking to a child and pinched Heavy's cheek.

The three men tried not to laugh at the scene.

"Prettiest woman in all the world!" The two lovers were cuddling now.

"This ain't creepy or anything. I'll go get drunk now," Demoman slurred as he dragged himself away from the scene.

Before the other men could say anything Lori turned to the Heavy, "Do you have a minute? I know I just got here but this can't wait."

Heavy looked to the two men looking for advice. The Medic gestured that he should go with Lori. The Heavy and Lori left the two men and made their way through the crowd.

….

Pierre flicked through the channels on his TV. The only interesting thing showing was some show that showed someone performing surgery on a person choking. The Frenchman was on his sofa cuddling a ginger cat.

"Look at that, Pumpkin," he spoke to the cat as if it was a child, "isn't it interesting? No?"

He then heard a distanced sound come from outside his balcony.

"Pumpkin! Where are you honey?" A feminine voice shouted. Pierre rolled his eyes as he got up from the sofa and walked towards the balcony. He opened the doors and placed the cat down. The animal then disappeared.

"Pumpkin, what have a I told you about visiting that strange man?" He heard the neighbour say out loud. He stared into the night and then went back inside. He wasn't that strange.

Before he sat down on his sofa again, his phone alerted making a jingle sound. He picked the device up from the table and was surprised to see an e-mail. It was from his boss.

Pierre smiled as soon as he saw the word 'promotion'. He quickly scrolled through the e-mail ready to burst with excitement. Everything was going to be better again.

Pierre tended to be a little too dedicated to his job and some people called him arrogant. But after all he was only doing his job properly. As his confidence increased he noticed his salary amount decreasing. Sure, he had a nice apartment and good lifestyle, but if he kept losing money, he'd lose everything. A promotion was the only thing that would get him back on track.

Pierre sat down on the sofa with a huge smile on his face as he continued to watch his strange surgery show.


	3. Chapter 3

**A.N So the last chapter took me about 2 weeks to make so hopefully it was better standard than chapter 1. This chapter will carry on from the party in the last chapter. And guess who's gonna make an appearance? :3 Keep reading and see who it is. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Team Fortress 2. It belongs to VALVe and I am happy they made it :') **

**Chapter 3**

"Soldier!" A voice shouted.

The helmet headed man, who was standing beside the Scout, turned towards the owner of the voice. A man was approached them.

"Merasmus!" The Soldier the approaching man awkwardly.

The Scout observed this being. He was tall and lanky wearing a long black robe, a ram's skull atop his head and a staff in his hand.

"This a Halloween party?" Scout muttered to the Soldier.

"Are you kidding me?" He muttered back. He then turned his attention back to the tall man, "How's my favourite son of a bitch keeping?"

"I am actually doing fine, you mewling quim," Merasmus replied with a hint of annoyance wearing a fake smile, "And how are you?"

"Better than most anyway," The Soldier laughed, "Remember that one time in college when I put that fire cracker in your hat? Man, people paid me respect! Kind of reminds me of this!"

"Of course!" Merasmus nodded his head with fake amusement, "remember that one time I used that spell that made your head heavy when you thought about breasts? You hit the ground when approached that young lady!"

The tall man then began to cackle evilly. He laughed so loud everyone in the area turned to look at him.

"Is he for real?" Scout muttered.

"Quiet, Maggot," Soldier muttered through gritted teeth, "He's a wizard and dangerous."

The tall wizard then stopped cackling, "I shall be off, ex-roommate. I hope you die a most painful death."

The Soldier laughed sarcastically, "You too, ex-roommate. Oh by the way, did you forget to take your Xanax this morning?"

"I feel bad for your friends."

"I feel bad for your face."

"You're both fighting like women, you know that, right?" Scout butted in.

"Call me when you grow some balls and be an American", Soldier ignored him.

"Call me when you do!" Merasmus continued.

"You've had no women."

"At least I don't have over 1000 that I lose track of names."

"Exactly."

"I hope you enjoy having a lot of babies."

"You look like an old mop."

"You're not as loved as you think you are."

"I am loved by every being in this room."

"I'm sure you are," the wizard then formed his hand in a round shape and moved quickly back and forth away from his mouth.

"You're a pathetic maggot."

"Well, ex-roommate, you're a little cunt!" The wizard then walked away showing he had enough.

The Scout and Soldier just watched as he walked away. Scout began to laugh as the Soldier just stared.

"You just got owned!" The younger man laughed. This only received him a hard hit in the face.

A while later, the Sniper, Medic, Scout, Pyro, Engineer, Demoman and Soldier were seated around another table. Heavy still hadn't returned. The men were musing about all the good times on the battle field and played drinking games. The men gasped as they heard the song 'Harder Better Faster Stronger' by Daft Punk playing throughout the house. The men all looked at the Engineer.

"Come on, Engie! Do it! Do it like you used to do it!" They all cried to him.

After a while, the Texan stood up taken a few shots. He made his way through the crowd to the dancing area.

"Make room - make room!" He shouted.

The people made a big enough space around him and the Texan began to do the robot to the song playing.

"En-gie! En-gie! En-gie! En-gie! En-gie! En-gie!" Everyone shouted around him.

"You guys…we gone be brothers for life…right?" The now drunk engineer slurred to the men around the table.

The men around the table all nodded and cheered. Except for the Demoman who was passed out on the table.

"We fight in the battle field – we die in the battle field," the soldier raised his glass. Everyone clinked theirs together.

Before they could continue talking a voice erupted the whole room.

"People!" It was the Heavy. He was standing on a spiral staircase. Beside him was Lori. He was smiling ear to ear, "Heavy wishes to make announcement!"

Everyone in the room turned their attention to the Russian.

"As some of you know, we have been together two years," Heavy put his arm around Lori, "Now I would like to announce that I will be Father soon!"

The team all looked at each other with surprise and the people began to cheer.

"Heavy would like to use this moment to do something," The Heavy smiled. He turned to Lori. The team gasped as he got down on one knee. Heavy reached into his pocket and produced a small box. He opened it. Lori gasped at what was inside.

"Will you marry Heavy, Lori?" The Russian asked looking nervous.

The woman pulled him to stand up again and kissed him on the cheek, "of course I will!"

The whole room erupted with cheers.

"Good on ye, Heavy!" The drunken Demoman shouted after waking.

Heavy turned to the crowd again and his face sort of dropped, "I would also like to announce retirement."

The team stopped cheering. They looked at their teammate with disbelief.

"Heavy needs to show dedication to family," he announced. Even Lori looked a bit shocked. The Heavy then looked at his team, "I would like to say 'thank you' to team. I will never forget times of great Victory."

The Heavy then began to compliment the team. But he took note of the Scout storming off taking alcohol with him.

"…and so," the Heavy tried to ignore the Scout, "I say goodbye! And good luck with future in battlefield."

Scout stood a far distance from the huge house, drinking and picking up rocks to throw into the trees.

"Scout! Scout! What are you trying to do, mate?!" The Sniper shouted at the younger man.

"I'm kinda pissed off right now so I'm getting drunk. That a problem?" Scout shouted at the Aussie.

"Hey! We are all upset as much as you are! But you don't see me throwing shit around and getting' pissed!"

The rest of the team, even Heavy, approached the two.

"What's goin' on here?" Engineer questioned.

"Oh, isn't it obvious?" Scout threw one a rock to the ground forcefully, "That fat lard of crap's upping and leaving us to get our asses kicked. Do you realise we will be nothing with out a heavy?"

"Well we're just gonna have to deal with it the hard way and step up our game." The Engineer approached the younger man.

"You know what victory does for us, right? Not only does it get us these big parties but we can feed our families using the reward money too! Without Heavy, we're dead!"

"Well we have to step…up…our game, Maggot," Soldier stepped in, "understand?!"

The Scout looked at the group for a while before speaking again.

"You know what? I'm done. I ain't dying just for nothing," he looked away from them.

"Quitting? That how it is now?" Sniper shouted at him, "real mature, mate!"

Engineer looked at his team mate, "You can't quit, Scout, we need- -"

"I'm with Scout," Medic spoke up. His hand was raised but his head was to the ground, "we will be nothing without the Heavy."

Sniper sighed heavily whilst throwing his hands in the air and turning away.

"But without a Medic there's no chance of us surviving!" Engineer shouted.

"I think Herr Scout has said it as it is," Medic looked at the Texan, "We need the full team and without Heavy…" He didn't continue.

There was a moment of silence in which the men stared at Scout and Medic with disbelief. The silence was broken when another voice sounded.

"What was noise?" The Heavy spoke as he approached the men.

"This is your fault," Sniper snapped pointing at the Russian. He then looked to the rest of the men, "You know what? Me too! With no Heavy we will have to step up the game majorly. Without a Scout who's gonna get the intel? Without a bloody Medic how are we supposed to survive a fight? I'm out!"

The Australian stopped his rant as he raised his hands above his head with frustration. The Heavy looked confused at the men.

"Count me out too," Demoman looked at the ground. The Scotsman seemed to sober up from the shock of the situation. He clasped his hands at the back of his head and turned so his back faced the group. He sighed, "Without a Sniper, who will have our bloody backs?"

"MAGGOTS! ALL OF YOU ARE MAGGOTS!" Soldier shouted at the men. He then spat on the ground and stormed off to a vehicle and drove off. The next to leave was Sniper…Then Demoman…Then Scout…Then Medic.

The Heavy looked at the remaining men and shook his head as he retreated back inside to the party.

"Looks like it's jus' you an' me now, Pyro," Engineer was looking at the house. He looked where the Pyro stood when he didn't hear a reply to see the Pyro wasn't even there. He spun around in confusion looking for the Pyromaniac. He saw his friend walking along the road looking sadly at the ground.

Engineer looked around. The men who had fought with were gone. Hopefully they would all calm down by the next morning. Or would they?

"Some brothers for life…"


End file.
